connect with yourself

Land of Balancing

In my 30's, when I was in a Bachelor degree program, I wrote a 40-page paper on Balance. I loved the idea of it, dreamed of it, really believed that if I could find the land of Balance, I would be calm, productive, and forever happy.

Pop! That's the sound of the balance illusion exploding. At some point I realized that there's no such thing as balance. It's the unicorn of self-improvement. There's only the land of Balancing. That's where I'm writing to you from now.

I am balancing once again after traveling while working for eleven days recently. During that time, I drove 1,221 miles, coached clients, observed a leadership course in which I will be a facilitator soon, was a student in a course on Emotional Intelligence (EQ), and facilitated a Stress Management Seminar for a corporation. I arrived home to my husband and a wonderful couple from Spain, whom we met in Ecuador during our motorcycle travels in 2016, and had invited to stay with us during their motorcycle travels.

I loved everything I did and everyone I was with and...I tipped too far out-of-balance. I felt emotionally and physically exhausted, fuzzy-headed, and knew I needed time to recharge. Giving myself what I needed felt kind and loving, and it worked.

The key is to notice when we're too far from our balancing point and move gently back toward it with oodles of self-compassion. Like Tree Pose in yoga, balancing on one foot with constant micro-movements to continually find the center balancing point for a moment.

What do you notice in your thoughts, body, or emotions when you're out of balance?

And then, how do you move back toward the land of Balancing?

In the spirit of knowing ourselves,

Jalene

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I help individuals and small businesses clarify their vision, build stronger connections with themselves and others, reach the results they want, and find more joy and satisfaction along the way. 

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All-in like a kid!

Remember the feeling of running as fast as you can? I got to watch that energy in action this week when I attended the track meet of my 11-year old niece Sedona in Boise, Idaho. She's the one with the strawberry blonde hair and "Highland's Elementary" visible on her shirt.

When she was running, I was caught up in picture-taking and the roar of parents cheering on their kids. Afterward, I looked closely at the photos and saw the all-out mental focus and physical effort she exerted during her 50-yard sprint. It was clear that on the inside, she really wanted to win. Her heart was all in! I recalled her adrenaline fed excitement at the end of the race. Afterward, I started thinking about how all these qualities connect with our heartfelt projects as adults.

As I build my business, I want to be like a kid running all-out! Mentally, I want to focus on what's most important. Physically, I want to take care of my body so I feel great and have the stamina to do good work. Emotionally, I want my work to be meaningful and helpful to my clients and that means it comes from my heart.

The difference between running a sprint as an 11-year old and running a business as a 54-year old is that I'm not racing against anyone and yet, at the core, the all-in energy exerted is the same. 

How can you "run like a kid" toward what's most important to you?

In the spirit of knowing ourselves,

Jalene

I help individuals and small businesses clarify their vision, build stronger connections with themselves and others, reach the results they want, and find more joy and satisfaction along the way. 

Executive & Personal Coaching

Professional & Personal Development

 

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Future Me

I have a desire to be involved in my community, to be one of the people who are making positive contributions in our world. That desire first came to me in Chile.

Burrowed deep inside my sleeping bag, on a cold morning camping in Chile during our motorcycle travels, I quickly reached out to grab my cell phone and check the US presidential election results. After I sat bolt upright to deliver the jaw-dropping news to my husband, I thought, "It's time for me to step up and be part of the change." Now, I feel the urge to put that ah-ha moment into action.

I'm looking for a place that feels right for me to be the woman I envisioned in that memorable moment. Last night, I went to a chapter meeting of NOW (National Organization for Women) and am wondering if it's the right place for me. To help me make the choice, the question that has risen above all others, is this:

 

What does "future me" want?

 

 

Thanks for the wisdom Florian!

This phrase "future me" came from a friend we met during our motorcycle travels. Florian, from Germany, who we met in Bolivia, would say things like, "Oh, future me won't like that," or "Future me wants me to do this."

What a clever way to envision our future. It offers a way to choose that moves us beyond the temporary discomfort of being the newbie in the room and toward the person we want to become.

In the spirit of knowing ourselves,

Jalene


I help individuals and small businesses clarify their vision, build stronger connections with themselves and others, reach the results they want, and find more joy and satisfaction along the way. 

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Giving Yourself a Break

How do you know when time away is the best way forward?

Many of us believe that getting on top of our To Do List means working harder on it, and working longer at it, even though our brains are fried, even though we’re mentally and physically exhausted. I’m practicing a new way of working, with surprising results.

Here’s the sparkling jewel I’ve discovered. When I take better care of myself, my work quality and production improves. What a revelation! Working harder and longer is not the answer. Here’s what it looks like for me these days, with it's little imperfections, of course.

Every day I write in my journal, get enough sleep, take breaks during the day for lunch and snacks, and eat well. Weekly (5-6 times) I do yoga or walk, and meditate. Every two months I get a massage. And here’s something new I just played with last week. I was in a funk. I wanted to get away from everything I was working on for a while so…I did. I gave myself a break, a mini retreat if you will, for a whole afternoon.

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My time away evolved into a 45-minute drive to Yachats where for $25 I could enjoy all the amenities of the Overleaf Spa & Resort for the day — hot tubs overlooking the ocean, dry & wet saunas, and luxuriously scented lotions. After I was a clean, wet noodle, I had a hankering for a treat from one of my favorite restaurants. A dessert called Boccone Dolce called to me. The air-light meringue dissolved on my tongue, while the tang of fresh berries and the richness of whipped cream and chocolate brought an audible “Mmmmm” from my joy-filled mouth. Nestled into a booth with sun pouring through the window, I sipped a decaf cappuccino and wrote in my trusty journal. Ahhhh…

Energy level raised, anxiety level lowered, I felt centered, nourished, and excited to dive back into my work.

How will you take care of yourself & give yourself a break?

In the spirit of knowing ourselves,

Jalene

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Psst...have I told you about my business?

I help individuals and small businesses clarify their vision, build stronger connections with themselves and others, reach the results they want, and find more joy and satisfaction along the way. 

 

Executive & Personal CoachingProfessional Development • Personal Workshops